A Broken Mission.....Trip

I am SO sad to say that....
Our mission trip in August to Nicaragua....with Highland....fell through and will not be happening.

I went for a “planning” meeting last week and arrived to be hit in the gut with... “God is just telling us now is not a good time”....

I wanted to cry....in fact, I did once I got back in my car.

In a nutshell, Wes and I were really the only ones with support even coming in....the only ones who had their deposit in....which really made me question if it was “God” or a lack of diligence on the part of others for raising support.

I was super emotional about it all last Thursday....lots of questions running through my mind....disappointment, frustration, anger....you name it, I have been dealing with it.

Some days have been better than ever. But I am still.....stumped....

I truly believe that there are “human reasons” why it has fallen through....poor planning....poor execution of details...but no matter how it happened, and no matter who I want to place blame on, I can’t.....I simply know it is how God wanted it for now....now was not the time....Yet still, I just can’t seem to let go of that.....

In my teeny tiny human mind, I am struggling to understand the plans of a Great Big God who knows better than I.....
I am struggling to try and figure out what God may have in store for us instead....
The questions in my mind disturb my sleep...baffle me.

I have resolved myself to the fact that I don’t understand God’s plan in this. I just have to trust....and it is so hard....I keep trying to figure it out. But I simply cannot.

To those of you reading that have sent us support, we are still making decisions for us and whether or not to simply go with a Vision Nicaragua supported trip or not this year....You will know soon....I promise.

There is a light at the end of the tunnel....and a door to walk through....I am just clouded by tears to see it now....
Coveting your prayers on this journey....and seeking Godly wisdom from the outside....
Heather